Still Fresh 

Tender 

Surreal 

These waves of grief wash over me 

Some carry disbelief

Others the sorrow of loss

Waves which take me by surprise

A memory

of a conversation, an embrace, a loving gesture.

In between these torrents 

Smiles of remembering 

The beauty-full nature 

of her

being human.

We were not close 

and yet upon hearing of her rebirth to the cosmic mother, 

I was immediately overcome with a flooding of tears, deep grief, utter disbelief.

I close my eyes and picture her face, 

A kaleidoscope of all of the moments 

that we have connected. 

I am surrounded in the presence of Love that is her. 

I feel the glowing radiance of the woman that she was.

“Grief expressed out loud for someone we have lost… is in itself the greatest praise we could ever give them. Grief is praise, because it is the natural way love honours what it misses.”

Martin Prechtel

Grief takes me inward, 

to remember all that has been grieved in the past (and might still be lingering).

This present grief, 

takes me to the losses of the distant past, to the grief that is mine, 

and that which is the collective.

My hips ache with the past. 

My heart breaks open in the present.

There is nothing to do.

Just Be.

Allowing these waves to ebb and flow 

To crash again and again 

on the shores of my whole being

welcoming them with grace

a gentle embrace,  with space 

to release and return 

to the oceanic waters that are mine, yours, ours and all of humanity.

In praise,

A heart of radiant gold.

A voice of an angel, who sung from the depths of her sweet soul. 

A woman who was both 

fire of passion and 

the sacred waters 

of unconditional love and devotion.

A sister who will be dearly missed earth side- loved, cherished and celebrated for the shining light that she was- and shared with those who had the pleasure and honor of knowing her. Eternally grateful for sharing your light with me.

I am always in awe, of reverence and deeply grateful for that which embraces the realms of death- loss, grief, and the wrapping of its ever spiraling nature around the lifeline that is the tethering of the facets and experiences of our life.

It truly is a portal, 

an invitation from our breaking heart 

to surrender

to fully open in our vulnerability and allow the light to enterwhich is the remembering of all the goodness that this Beloved Being we have lost has brought to our life.

In these darkest moments of grief, collapse, bewilderment, disbelief and heartbreak we can see, feel, and know what the meaning of life (and the meaning of those lives who have entwined with ours) truly is.

This is the Beauty Way.

“The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.”

Khalil Gibran